Sinéad had a rough night last night. She had her fingers in her mouth a lot and I could feel 2-year molars coming in. I spent a lot of the night sitting up holding her so she could sleep.  It seemed to be teething.

8:30am we had clinic. Naomi’s labs started coming back quickly. WBCs 1.7; Hemoglobin 9.9; platelets held at 20. It was all good because she wouldn’t need any transfusions. ANC was over 1200!

While there we did some school lessons.

So the G-CSF was halted and we were sent back to RMH within 2 hours needing no care at the clinic. It was an easy morning and we would be due back Friday AM.

Sinéad slept in the stroller the whole time. During the clinic visit I heard her breathing was getting louder. Once I thought I heard a barking cough.

We came back to RMH and made lunch, cleaned our room a bit and then went to take naps. During the nap I noticed Sinéad’s breathing got progressively more concerning.

By 4:30pm I’d decided to take her for evaluations. I contacted Naomi’s doctor and said that I thought Sinéad had croup and he arranged a visit at the ER for us.  I completed Naomi’s infusions, packed Sinéad into the stroller and called a friend to stay with Naomi & Caitríona.

When we got to the ER we didn’t wait at all. They took us directly into the evaluation room.  Sinéad had labored breathing, and occasional barking coughing. She’d barely eaten all day, had a fever over 103 and had little interest in nursing. Her heart rate was high 170s to 180s and her o2 levels were 94-95.

They immediately gave her a breathing treatment. It didn’t do anything. They did a chest X-ray to rule out swallowing something. It was all clear of foreign objects but showed narrowing windpipe due to croup. They gave her steroids and then she started improving quickly.

Before long she was trying to sing with me. I said, “won’t you say you love me too?” She replied with a very pathetic, “too.”  They repeatedly asked if she was always this sweet. I said that she generally is very sweet. We snuggled on the hospital bed and watched Curious George.  Sinéad adores monkeys – 5 little monkeys, Curious George, books, etc.  She nursed to sleep and her heart rate improved so much while she slept on me. Her o2 levels went up to 97-98. We were released at 9:00pm. We came back and ate some yogurt, apple slices, leftover tortilla soup and scrambled eggs. Sinéad ate rather well and repeatedly asked for more water.

Now, we hope and pray that Naomi doesn’t get it. A friend at RMH stayed with Naomi and Cait while I was at the hospital with Sinéad. She also helped Naomi move her bed out of my, Cait and Sinéad’s bedroom and into the living room. For the next few days we will maintain distance. I’ve been very prudent at washing hands and we use hand sanitizer constantly.  Just another bump in the road.

God apparently thinks I am very strong to handle all this alone. I’ve thought to get on my knees and beg and plead for this cup to be taken from me. Except that my children deserve it. They deserve a competent mother who remains calm in scary and concerning circumstances. Instead of begging and pleading for my lot to leave me, I’m holding fast and so grateful for where we are, with a team to support us and physicians who care for my children and the wisdom to know what to do in these situations. But sleep. I’ll just beg for sleep. And countdown to the day I see my husband and children back home.

Sinéad is happy to be back with Naomi and Cait. We were afraid she would be admitted. Naomi broke down in tears when she heard how badly Sinéad’s breathing had gotten during the nap. She said, “I’ve never heard someone sound like that before and it’s horrible to not be able to help her.”  Tomorrow we will go get a prescription of steroids and ibuprofen for Sinéad. Friday she will have a follow up appointment at the doctor’s office.  Tonight, she is in a deep sleep beside me and I’m thankful and trusting that Naomi will be protected. Tomorrow the apartment will be sanitized while Naomi hangs out in our kitchen. That is my plan….